Season 3
13 episodes · Aug 6, 2003
With Simon gone, Brian and Kurt turn to his replacement for advice—the suave and morally-flexible Matt. But married Matt is much more interested in his own affairs, and it falls upon new biology teacher Lindsay to help them out. Lindsay’s funny, frank, down-to-earth and, most importantly, she’s fat—an essential safety feature for an agony aunt that ensures Brian and Kurt won’t end up fancying her. Probably.
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S3E1Episode One
Aug 6, 200348mA new term and a new teacher, in the (rather large) shape of Lindsay. She can outdrink the boys, and Brian in particular thinks she’s brilliant, until Kurt convinces him that she fancies him.
S3E2Episode Two
Aug 13, 200348mPenny’s self-obsession and self-pity have reached such dizzying new heights that she’s driving everyone insane. Bored to tears with her moaning, Lindsay finally cracks.
S3E3Episode Three
Aug 20, 200348mKurt thinks his luck with the ladies is changing. At parents’ evening he meets a woman he reckons he has a good chance of pulling. As usual, however, his judgement in these matters isn’t perfect.
S3E4Episode Four
Aug 27, 200348mBobs wife throws him out of the house and moves her boyfriend in. For the first time, Liz takes pity on this dishevelled wreck. But a combination of pity and alcohol can have surprising results.
S3E5Episode Five
Sep 3, 200348mLindsay is about to turn 30, which is fine, until everyone points out that 30 is very old. What’s the best way to handle being 30? Grow old with grace and start acting your age, or the exact opposite?
S3E6Episode Six
Sep 10, 200348mHalf the staff are off with stress, leaving the other half even more stressed. In a desperate bid to relieve the pressure, Clare assigns them all a stress partner, which proves very stressful.
S3E7Episode Seven
Sep 17, 200348mThere’s something disturbing in the air. A stranger, with a sinister beard, is lurking by the perimeter fence. But it turns out that he’s not so strange after all.
S3E8Episode Eight
Sep 24, 200348mThe English department are left without a head when Bob is taken in for emergency surgery, and Clare decides that, whether he likes it or not, Matt is the ideal choice to act as Bobs replacement.
S3E9Episode Nine
Oct 1, 200348mThe teachers are depressed that none of them is in a functional relationship, until Liz points out that Brian and Kurt are as good as married. But Brian thinks that Kurt is taking advantage of him.
S3E10Episode Ten
Oct 8, 200348mStudents and parents have been complaining about Lindsay, and she’s ended up with a formal warning. So she’s going to transform herself into ‘super-teacher’, with help from an unlikely guru: Bob.
S3E11Episode Eleven
Oct 15, 200348mBrians obsessed with Eileen—the only good-looking dinner lady in the world—and when Bob starts complaining loudly about the canteen food, Brian has to stand up for his dream woman.
S3E12Episode Twelve
Oct 22, 200348mWhen Brian and Kurt race each other to school, Kurt’s desire to win results in injury. Brian’s attempts to administer first aid only serve to make things worse and Kurt ends up in a wheelchair.
S3E13Episode Thirteen
Oct 29, 200348mLove, lust, and general weirdness are in the air. Penny’s started a new romance, Clare’s getting frisky, and in a drunken moment Matt and Lindsay find themselves snogging.