Two and a Half Men

Season 9

24 episodes · Sep 19, 2011

A new chapter begins when internet billionaire Walden Schmidt moves in, bringing fresh energy, wealth, and more absurd adventures to the Malibu household.

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  • Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt
    S9E1

    Nice to Meet You, Walden Schmidt

    Sep 19, 201121m

    Alan and Jake meet Walden Schmidt, a broken-hearted billionaire.

    Reviews
  • People Who Love Peepholes
    S9E2

    People Who Love Peepholes

    Sep 26, 201121m

    Walden deals with his ex-wife, Bridget.

    Reviews
  • Big Girls Don't Throw Food
    S9E3

    Big Girls Don't Throw Food

    Oct 3, 201120m

    Alan prepares Walden for a date with Bridget, while Jake decides to emulate Walden and drop out of school.

    Reviews
  • Nine Magic Fingers
    S9E4

    Nine Magic Fingers

    Oct 10, 201121m

    Walden goes looking for Mrs. Right while Alan has an opportunity to reconcile with Lyndsey.

    Reviews
  • A Giant Cat Holding a Churro
    S9E5

    A Giant Cat Holding a Churro

    Oct 17, 201120m

    Alan has trouble accepting Lyndsey's seedy movie past, and Walden tries to cheer him up by throwing a party.

    Reviews
  • The Squat and Hover
    S9E6

    The Squat and Hover

    Oct 24, 201121m

    Walden receives divorce papers from Bridget, but forgets his depression when he meets a girl who looks eerily like her.

    Reviews
  • Those Fancy Japanese Toilets
    S9E7

    Those Fancy Japanese Toilets

    Oct 31, 201119m

    Jake has a crush on his chemistry tutor, who has a crush on Walden. Meanwhile, Alan obsesses over the journal his brother left him in his will.

    Reviews
  • Thank You for the Intercourse
    S9E8

    Thank You for the Intercourse

    Nov 7, 201121m

    When Walden begins redecorating the beach house, Alan becomes overly emotional.

    Reviews
  • Frodo's Headshots
    S9E9

    Frodo's Headshots

    Nov 14, 201121m

    Upon his release from the hospital, Alan is met with a slew of challenges that test his ability to cope.

    Reviews
  • A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes
    S9E10

    A Fishbowl Full of Glass Eyes

    Nov 21, 201121m

    Walden hits it off with a British babe, but neither of them is sure he's ready to re-enter the dating world.

    Reviews
  • What a Lovely Landing Strip
    S9E11

    What a Lovely Landing Strip

    Dec 5, 201120m

    Walden is trying his best to impress his new love interest when Bridget reappears in his life.

    Reviews
  • One False Move, Zimbabwe!
    S9E12

    One False Move, Zimbabwe!

    Dec 12, 201121m

    Walden's mother arrives and Alan is smitten with her, even as she reveals a secret about Walden's past that sends him into a downward spiral.

    Reviews
  • Slowly and in a Circular Fashion
    S9E13

    Slowly and in a Circular Fashion

    Jan 2, 201220m

    Walden's ex-wife and mother try to take control of his company, so he turns to Alan for help.

    Reviews
  • A Possum on Chemo
    S9E14

    A Possum on Chemo

    Jan 16, 201220m

    Zoey tries to convince Walden to cut his hair and shave; Alan and Lyndsey revive their relationship.

    Reviews
  • The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack
    S9E15

    The Duchess of Dull-in-Sack

    Feb 6, 201221m

    Walden tries to loosen Zooey up by sharing some of Berta's special brownies.

    Reviews
  • Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy
    S9E16

    Sips, Sonnets and Sodomy

    Feb 13, 201220m

    Strained relationships and girl-fighting result when a huge storm traps Walden, Alan, Zoey and Lyndsey in the house on Valentine's Day.

    Reviews
  • Not in My Mouth!
    S9E17

    Not in My Mouth!

    Feb 20, 201219m

    Walden and Zoey's relationship suffers after they share a near-death experience. Meanwhile, Alan wonders if Lyndsey has a drinking problem.

    Reviews
  • The War Against Gingivitis
    S9E18

    The War Against Gingivitis

    Feb 27, 201221m

    Walden's ex-business partner shows up at the beach house looking to make peace.

    Reviews
  • Palmdale, Ech
    S9E19

    Palmdale, Ech

    Mar 19, 201221m

    Alan and Lyndsey introduce their mothers. Jake and Eldridge get a ride from Walden to a party.

    Reviews
  • Grandma's Pie
    S9E20

    Grandma's Pie

    Apr 9, 201221m

    Walden breaks the news to Zoey that he is going into business with his ex-wife. Alan and Lyndsey try to cope with their mom's relationship.

    Reviews
  • Mr. Hose Says "Yes"
    S9E21

    Mr. Hose Says "Yes"

    Apr 16, 201221m

    Walden's commitment is tested when Zoey and her daughter come to live with him. Meanwhile, Alan gets more than he bargained for when he moves in with Lyndsey

    Reviews
  • Why We Gave Up Women
    S9E22

    Why We Gave Up Women

    Apr 30, 201221m

    Charlie's ghost pays a visit to Alan after he suffers a minor heart attack.

    Reviews
  • The Straw in My Donut Hole
    S9E23

    The Straw in My Donut Hole

    May 7, 201221m

    Alan is showered with love and affection upon returning from the hospital, but Zoey isn't so sure it's deserved.

    Reviews
  • Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!
    S9E24

    Oh Look! Al-Qaeda!

    May 14, 201221m

    Jake is pressured to make a decision about his future.

    Reviews