Season 7
23 episodes · Oct 6, 1982
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- S7E1
Sorry, Wrong Lips
Oct 6, 198230mDebbie Reynolds plays an actress whose torrid memoirs convince Mel he's the one she remembers as the greatest kisser in her life.
- S7E2
Do You Take . . . ?
Oct 13, 198230mMel tries to outdo an old buddy who shows up boasting a track record of fast living and sporting a blonde on his arm as proof.
- S7E3
The Secret of Mel's Diner
Oct 20, 198230mThere's gold in them there walls, or so Mel reckons after learning that the eccentric who built his diner left $20,000 stashed in another building.
- S7E4
Alice at the Palace
Oct 27, 198230mJoel Grey offers his services gratis as the leading man in a musical revue bankrolled by Mel and featuring Alice. Mel, however, has never heard of Grey and gives the role to his bookie.
- S7E5
Joel Grey Saves the Day
Nov 3, 198230mJoel Grey walks out after producer Mel turns a revue about New York into a desert musical with tunes like ""Two Tootsies from Tucson"" and ""Ramona from Arizona.""
- S7E6
Alice's Turkey of a Thanksgiving
Nov 10, 198230mAlice's meddlesome mother knocks the stuffing out of her daughter's Thanksgiving dinner.
- S7E7
Carrie on the Rebound
Jan 9, 198330mCarrie is slow to come out of a depression after a quickie divorce.
- S7E8
Jolene's Brother Jonas
Jan 16, 198330mJolene's brother pays a surprise visit, but the surprise is on him, he gets an icy reception from his sister.
- S7E9
Alice Sees the Light
Feb 28, 198330mEveryone takes with a grain of salt Alice's claim that she saw a UFO.
- S7E10
Vera the Virtuoso
Mar 7, 198330mVera, whose cello playing can reduce a virtuoso to tears, is asked to play in a local string quartet.
- S7E11
Alice Faces the Music
Mar 14, 198330mThe waitresses pit their musical knowledge against that of three plumbers on a TV quiz show.
- S7E12
Tommy, the Jailbird
Mar 21, 198330mAlice fears that freshman Tommy is abusing his new freedom away from home by majoring in extracurricular activities.
- S7E13
Jolene and the Night Watchman
Mar 28, 198330mJolene can't bring herself to bruise the tender feelings of a bruiser who saved her life and now considers her his girl.
- S7E14
Mel's Dream Car
Apr 11, 198330mMel is stripping his gears over his jazzy new Porsche he purchased for a measly $20.
- S7E15
Come Back Little Sharples
Apr 17, 198330mMel has had it up to his keister with the way things are going so he absconds to his apartment for a beer and pizza binge.
- S7E16
Vera, the Torch
Apr 24, 198330mVera wishes her landlady the worst for evicting her pets then feels responsible when the old crank's apartment catches on fire.
- S7E17
The Grass is Always Greener
May 1, 198330mIn role reversals, Mel becomes an employee by accepting an executive position with a catering firm, and the waitresses become owners by buying his diner.
- S7E18
Tommy Fouls Out
May 15, 198330mAfraid that he's lost the ""right stuff,"" Tommy quits the basketball team.
- S7E19
Vera on the Lam
May 22, 198330mAfter Mel decides to have the waitresses bonded, Vera owns up to a criminal past and takes it on the lam.
- S7E20
Mel's Cousin Wendy?
May 29, 198330mTo steal a competitor's secret sauce recipe, Mel persuades his cousin to pose as a woman and apply for a job as a Burger Baby.
- S7E21
Sweet Erasable Mel
Jun 5, 198330mMel's experiment with a computer goes well until Vera enters a transaction and erases every trace of Mel's financial existance.
- S7E22
Tommy Hyatt, Business Consultant
Jun 12, 198330mUsing Tommy's marketing advice, Mel increases his business but also learns he's heading for bankruptcy.
- S7E23
Jolene Lets the Cat Out of the Bag
Sep 18, 198330mJolene's hair is standing on end with a cat burglar prowling her neighborhood.