Season 1
30 episodes · Mar 7, 2016
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S1E1Best Foot Forward
Mar 7, 20166mFreshman Dorothy Castlemore is not having a good day. A fresh black eye, a douchey mortal enemy getting in her way and nobody around she can punch. At least she has the internet and a cute new roommate to help cheer her up!
S1E2Flying Off the Handle
Mar 7, 20166mDorothy has decided which sororities, er, sorority she's going to pledge and makes some unwise choices. Unwise? Unwise.
- S1E3
A Meeting of Minds
Mar 7, 20166mDorothy has made some…interesting new friends. Although their sorority skills are great, they have a lot to learn about the internet before they're ready to save anyone.
S1E5What's Your Preference
Mar 11, 20166mDorothy is a shoe-in for a bid to MST. Or so she thought. Oh sweet summer child.
S1E6Nothing Is Good and Everything Hurts
Mar 14, 20166mHow do you solve a problem like Dorothy-Blob? How do you catch a cloud and use it to cheer up your friend who is in the depths of despair because she feels like her life's dreams are over?
S1E7Stop Me If You've Heard This One
Mar 16, 20166mWhat could go wrong at a sleepover? Seriously, trust an Episode Description Writer, this will just be happy fun times!
S1E8A Revelation or Two
Mar 18, 20166mOkay...sooo I, your humble Episode Description Writer, was wrong about the last episode. I apologize. But, I bet there won't be any drama in this one! Let's see, In Episode 8: Dorothy finds out the REAL reason she and Connie were rejected from MST. ...Frack.
S1E9Vengeance Interruptus
Mar 21, 20166mThe gang return from the union meeting and recap their pear-ilous confrontation.
S1E10I Solemnly Swear That I Am Up to No Good
Mar 23, 20166mMiller and Dorothy forget the camera is on. A lot. Plus, the girls meet Miller for the first time and at least one terrible pun is made. Seriously, it's awful. My pear pun from last episode description was much better.
S1E11Don’t You Dare Look Back
Mar 25, 20166mAlex and Miller work through the drama of their shared past the best way possible - in front of everyone and a camera! (I should really stop teasing them for forgetting about the camera. If they remembered, I'd be out of a job!)
S1E12Bugaboo
Mar 28, 20166mDespite some tensions, the group goes on a mission to plant a bug in Rick's office. Meanwhile, Alex opens up to the Inseparables about her history with Miller. (We're having a performance review today. I tried extra hard to make this a professional episode description.)
S1E13100% Success Rate
Mar 30, 20166mThere is a party. And foam swords! There are heart-to-hearts. And foam swords!!! There is dancing. AND FOAM SWORDS! ...I wish I had a foam sword. ...I wish I had friends who would have foam sword fights with me. ...I wish I existed outside of this description box so that I could make friends who would have foam sword fights with me.
S1E14The Red Pill
Apr 1, 20166mEveryone makes smart choices and nothing goes wrong! Is what I would write if I were writing this episode description on opposite day.
S1E15Backstab in the Back
Apr 4, 20166mCan I tell you a story? It's about 4 friends: Schmorthy, Schmortia, Schmariana & Schmiller. Once upon a time they did not go behind their friend Schmalex's back. The end. The people in this episode are not as sensible as the Schmusketeers.
S1E16Fish in a Barrel
Apr 6, 20166mBlaster toys solve all problems right? Right? Well, Dorothy & Co. seem to think so. And maybe if we all believe hard enough, it'll come true! If you believe, clap your hands! (It's impossible for me to hear you clap, but I'll know whether you did by watching the outcome of this episode.)
S1E17The Good Guys
Apr 8, 20166mDorothy, Ariana, Miller & Portia. Or as I sometimes call them: DAMP. No. NO. WHAT ARE YOU DOING DAMP! DAMP STOP IT NOW. WHY DOES NO ONE LISTEN TO ME. PLEASE DAMP PLEASE DON'T DO THIS.
S1E18Midnight
Apr 11, 20166mSigh. Let's be honest. Our heroes have gone off the rails. And there's nothing you or I can do about it. Excuse me while I go ponder the futility of my existence in a world where I am completely incapable of influencing what will happen and my only purpose in life is to record what has already come to pass.
S1E19It Hits the Fan
Apr 13, 20166mThis was an emotional roller coaster. I need to go lie down. You go ahead without me. I'll meet you at the next episode.
S1E20Last Dance with Miller Winters
Apr 15, 20166mHey, who turned out the lights? Hey, who turned out the lights? Hey, who turned out the lights? (Hey, who turned the creep levels of this series up?)
S1E21We'll Do It Live
Apr 30, 20166mWow. This episode has everything. A new location. French accents. Dramatic poses. People rolling around on furniture. Philosophical musings on juiceboxes. Everything except swords. But it's more likely someone would hurt themselves if there were swords so maybe it's for the best. I'd hate it if someone died. Also can you believe they did this episode live? That's daring, I wish I was as brave as them. And for 20 minutes too! I feel like I need to make this description longer to match it. But I don't have a lot to say... Anyway. Back to Dorothy. She's gonna try and convince everyone to come back! And that makes me so excited? Because I've missed everyone.
S1E22Caper
May 2, 20166mI don't know if any of you read these…or even know I exist. But I'm kinda sad. I thought now that our main characters were back together things would be fine, but they're not? So if you are reading this and want to help make an Episode Description Writer's day, can you, I don't know, like post a joke or share a funny story in the comments? Or don't. It's fine. I'm fine. I'll just console myself with the fact we got a Portia-centric episode and pretend that she's my friend. (I'm so lonely).
S1E23Rough at the Edges
May 4, 20166mThis episode is so long and so much happens in it, I don't even know where to BEGIN to describe it. Which I would normally be a lot more stressed about. It's my job, after all, to accurately and succinctly tease the events in each episode. Admittedly, I'm not very good at my job. But I don't want head office to know that. I haven't heard from them since that performance review though. In fact…I haven't heard from anyone in a while...
S1E24Underhanded
May 6, 20166mRight! Sorry about last week's description! We're going to turn things around and make these description boxes back into happy happy fun places! You can tell by all the exclamation marks! In this episode, the gang must decide whether they can trust Rochefort!!!! :D
S1E25Dorothy the Sigma
May 9, 20166mAn excited Dorothy becomes a Mu Sigma Theta pledge! (I don't think this is working!) And spends some time with Connie! (I think I've stumbled onto something!) In a new location! (and i think they know!) But an old 'friend' returns to ruin everything! (Help me!)
S1E26The Connie Conundrum
May 11, 20166mDorothy furiously tries to set things right after Connie's private photos are leaked. I've decided that I'm going to furiously set things right too. No matter the consequences. All for one? (ง'̀-'́)ง
S1E27But What If
May 13, 20166mDorothy tries to stop Connie from leaving! They just sent me my next assignment. It means I'll be leaving soon too. But… I'm not ready to leave. There's still too much left to do. (ง'̀-'́)ง
S1E28Bonacieux Bonanza
May 16, 20166mDorothy and the Mu Sigma Theta sisters begin Operation REMSTCIATISADCWSFAVBAPBP by throwing a fundraiser to raise enough money to keep Connie at Dumas College. I begin Operation WELLS. I'll send the code word if I make it. (ง'̀-'́)ง
S1E29Douche Heel Turn
May 18, 20166mThe girls try to stop Rochefort & the union from wrecking their fundraiser before they run out of Time. (ง'̀-'́)ง
S1E30Inseparable
May 20, 20166mIt's time to say goodbye to Connie. And to Episode Description Writer 251214. They have already been relocated. We apologize for any inconveniences. We hope you had a pleasant experience with Description Corp. and that you use our services again.